Molly's Corner

*flops in* I'M ALIVE!!! Well, barely, anyway. The drive there was boring as usual. Visiting with family was good. The drive back was boring too. Gorged on junk food of various types, ate too much dinner, etc. Whee, aren't these fun?? *spazz flail* Sorry, I'm kind of spazzy after being confined in a cramped minivan for two days. *twitch*

*deep breath* Okay, I'm better...on another note I haven't read ANY of Tale of Two Cities (bad me! *slaps wrist*), but I did get my mom's Christmas present done: a black beret, crocheted over the trip. I can get a LOT of crocheting done on those trips, especially since I don't seem to get carsick if I read/crochet/do things with my hands in a car. But I ran out of yarn, which is sad. *sigh* But I couldn't take any more yarn because it was really crowded in the van. I mean, REALLY crowded. Whoever rode in the backseat (usually me) had to lie down squished between a backpack of stuff and three pillows and a guitar case on the floor....it was pretty comfy, actually. I got to sleep a lot. Which was nice. Oh, and family-wise I got to teach my younger cousin (she's nine) how to crochet a chain-stitch, which occupied her for a good two hours or so (ahh, peace and quiet...). It is now 4:15, and we got home at 3:00 this afternoon, and I was down at the gym by 3:30. So it's been a busy day so far.

I invited Mike over for Thanksgiving (we're celebrating on Wednesday), and he said that he'd love to but it depends on the weather. If it's dry out, the farmers will be out harvesting in the fields and he'll probably be working. If it's wet, then it'll most likely be a go. But his schedule is so random that it's up in the air at the moment... *crosses fingers* So...yeah. It's getting easier to talk to him, by the by. I think we're getting more and more comfortable with each other or something...I dunno. Whatever's going on, it's good.

Oh! I almost forgot! This afternoon we stopped by a music store for a while, and while Dad and Will drooled over guitars I sat down at a piano (used, out of tune, but beggars can't be choosers) and got to play music. It was SO nice...and I discovered that I can sit down and sight-read music fairly well--not completely up to speed, by any means, but both hands went together at a decent pace. I surprised myself. *glee* And now for the life of me I can't remember what song I was playing...I played it twice...something about since the singer has someone who needs them they're a new person, or something like that. An old, slow song, anyway...and now that's going to bug the heck out of me. *headdesk*

It did! This morning it was puttsing along great, just like it normally does, and this afternoon KAPOOT. Will told me earlier today something about it not coming on, and I just shrugged it off thinking that he didn't do it right. Well...he was right. Ya push the button, it goes "WHIR" for two seconds and then it dies. ARGH!! *throws computor out window*

Ahh, I feel better. Well...not really. D: The only good thing is that my NaNo is saved on a thumb drive and my mom's computor and that all my music is on my iPod. But...but...my poor compy... Time for a visit to the computor doctor...

In other news, I ordered a NaNoWriMo mug (my gratuitious NaNo-related shtuff that I get during November) and it came today. It's gorgeous, look! https://store.lettersandlight.org/merchandise/nanowrimo-brown-travel-mug I'm currently drinking hot chocolate out of it, and MAN does it do a fabulous job keeping things hot!! I've burnt my mouth twice already. You'd think that I'd learn. XD And I just learned that my new tennis shoes match my mug, with the brown and the blue and the white. *looks around shifty-eyed* Concidence?? Maybe...

All righty, now for musing time. Mom has brought it to my attention that, although Mike is not a computor person, there may come a time that he would check out my website here, where I have been posting 'the Mike Saga', as I call it. So...I'm going to kind of cool it with the 'Mike Saga' updates, because in the off-chance that he checks out my site I have the whole sordid tale from my POV all over it and he probably would think it was a wee bit on the childish side. At least, that's the feeling I get. So...maybe some minor updates here and there if something amazing happens but I won't be rushing to post and go "OMG I talked to him tonight!!!" I hope ya'll understand... :D

What else, what else...my NaNo is going rather slowly, so I just had my character fall off her horse during a trail ride and break her arm. This is the meanest I've been to my MC--I would feel sorry for her but she's been digging her heels in and refusing to cooperate lately, so she had it coming! And now I have tons to write about. *rubs hands together* And I've reached 40,000 words tonight! Only 10,000 more to go! *happy dance*

Listening to: the teacher rambling
Mood: Normal

Apologies for not updating yesterday... *headdesk* But here goes.

Met for coffee yesterday! I got there a bit early, so I went ahead and ordered mine before he got there (pumpkin brickle latte...mmm), and epicly spilled part of my coffee over the counter by knocking it with my hand. *rolls eyes* By the time he got there I had cleaned it up, he ordered some coffee, and we just sat in there and talked the whole time. I can't just relay EVERYTHING we said, I have to be asked about specific subjects (and I have approximately three minutes to devote to this journal), but I did find out that the reason he moved to this area was because he lost his job and life had just been falling apart (apparently he was engaged last year (!!) and it fell apart, poor fella) so he picked up everything and moved. So yeah...we had a fabulous visit, I think. And I discovered that I cannot drink 12 ounces of coffee without having to visit the bathroom at least once. *headdesk* I lasted almost an hour (we talked for an hour and a half) with unbearable pressure on my bladder, eh heh. Oh, and before we parted ways he asked when I would be working again and gave me a hug (not quite a real one, he had a cup of coffee in one hand so it was more of a slightly awkward one-armed hug, BUT STILL). Eee. ^-^ So I is happeh...

What else...it's been raining for almost three days, ugh. I don't want to go outside at ALL. I haven't gone out to see the horses except to feed morning and evening, and forget walking Javert--even he doesn't want to go outside more than is necessary. All I want to do is stay inside (when I'm not working or doing school), drink tea, and watch Jeeves and Wooster. XD

On the topic of NaNo: 36,000 words yesterday! If I keep writing 2,000 words a day I should be finished in a week, which should be the 25th. Right? *doesn't trust non-existent math skillz* I'll be done before the deadline, anyway. My story is crap, so I'm just going to reach 50,000 and drop it, because if I keep going the way I am it'll take 200K to finish it. *headdesk* It's very, very, VERY slow. And drawn-out. And annoying me. I WANNA WRITE SOMETHING ELSE!!!

Tomorrow morning. 10:00. Coffee. IT'S A GO!!!

For those that may not understand, that means that I am meeting Mike tomorrow morning at the coffee shop. *runs around in circles* AAAH I'M SO EXCITED!! And I was SO nervous asking (inside, that is--outwardly I was playing it cool), but he was completely fine with that and PHEW. I'm so glad that I finally asked. *lifts weight off of shoulders*

Oh, and I mentioned Saturday's game this evening--it turns out that he had to work, so that's why I didn't see him. Oh well. He's going to another game this Saturday (I think) so maybe I can 'accidentally' bump into him again. XD Still don't have his number, but the only reason that I didn't ask is because I gave him cookies (chocolate and white chip *nomnom*) and asked him out to the coffee shop. I don't wanna overwhelm the poor man. :D

Eek, I know, I haven't updated in five days, shoot me naow... *headdesk* However! I was updating in my DA journal (...don't ask why I wasn't updating here too, I just wasn't) so I can just cut-and-paste updates on there and summarize because I'm lazy that way. My affectionate nickname for the upcoming is "The Mike Saga" (gives it an epic feel, don't it? XD)

So, starting on November 12th:
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West Side Story was AMAZING. Just...*sputter* Okay, start from the beginning. It was a high school production, but every single dang one of those kids could sing AND act!! They had a full orchestra in the pit (about 75 kids JUST in the pit), about 200 kids in the cast total, and...it was fantastic. I was cringing slightly before the kid who played Tony sang, but the moment he opened his mouth I was scraping my jaw off the floor and going 'OH MY GOSH.' Everyone was amazing...I would LOVE to get a copy of that production.

Maria--amazing
Bernardo--perfect (looked like the movie version of Bernardo)
Anita--fabulous

And the dancing was to die for. Absolutely gorgeous... *wibbles*

(Looking in the program there was a list of plays that they did all the way back to 1915. In 2006 they did Les Mis... almost two years before I was aware of its existence, GAH. *headdesk*)

I had considered asking Mike to go to this play, but had asked a friend of mine to go instead. Last night I was kind of torn...it would have been really, really awkward to me, but I also wonder how things would have gone if he HAD come. *sigh* I'm sitting in for Mom at the gym for a little while this morning wondering if he's going to come in... *wibbles again*

November 13th

GOSH, life suddenly seems to have just gotten even more insane. Two days ago I was lassoed into playing accompaniment music for a friend of mine who is auditioning for some sort of singing thing (brain-fart, it's not that I don't think it's important, I just can't think of what it's called), and I got the music two evenings ago. I'm playing it tomorrow. O_o AAACK.

Other things on my list of TTD (things to do) :

~Homework due Monday and Tues (20 thumbnails and an essay *twitch*)
~Get NaNo wordcount in (27000 and counting!)
~Finish one of my scrappy scarfs and start another
~Start getting my act and Christmas presents for other people together
~Ask Mike for his number and see if he wants to go out for coffee

May not look like much, but I also have a house to clean this afternoon, work at the gym this evening, and practice piano LATER this evening. AAAAGH.

ETA: MIKE CAME IN TONIGHT! I'M GONNA DIE!!! *runs around in circles*

More on November 13th

Isn't it weird how life can seem to take huge swings from the heights of ecstasy to the depths of despair in just a few hours? (No, I'm not bipolar.) My friend puts it as being 'twitterpated'...I'm inclined to agree. *headdesk*

So this afternoon at the gym I waited ALL evening for Mike to come in. Around 6 (half an hour before I close the gym) I had just about given up hope and was editing my previous journal entry to voice said lack of hope when he walks right in the door. Then we struck up some conversation (which until a few minutes ago I couldn't remember what we talked about--something about CPR training. Don't ask.), and I completely lost my nerve. Earlier today I was bragging (sort of) to my brother that I was totally going to ask for Mike's number and see if he wanted to hang out, but the moment we started talking all rational thought blew out of my mind and by the time it occured to me to ask for his number he was on the other side of the room lifting weights (a good 60 feet away) and there were people around and I was far, far too shy/embarrassed to ask by that point. -_-; I was so disappointed in myself that I was in tears when I got home. *headdesk* I'm still a little teary thinking about it. *headdesk deux* What makes it worse is that HE was initiating conversation and being friendly and incredibly nice and...and... *cries*

So now I'm all depressed... *sighs and curls up with mug of tea and Wodehouse*

(My optimistic side won't leave it on that note, however: his parents are coming to visit this weekend (not sure what the significance of that to my subconscious is) and he's still got that plate that we sent leftovers from Tuesday on, so I'm going to have to get that back sometime. )

November 14th

My recording went off very well! It turned out that one of the songs wasn't needed, so I only had to play one song. That took a couple of hours this morning. Then, at the end of that session, Mom gives me a call and informs me that Mike came in with his parents to the gym. Said parents had driven nearly four hours from Joliet (...not sure how you spell that) to see the state-applicant football game in town. These parents weren't dressed to work out either. Mom was positive that he came in to introduce them to me. So she got the brilliant idea that I should go to this football game and see if I could 'bump' into him and his parents. I thought it was an okay idea, so I went ahead and went to this game.

Now, I have no interest in football. To be honest, I find the game kind of boring and nonsensical. But that's just me. I also haven't been to a game in over five years. But. I went ahead and went. I didn't know at the time that it was the state-applicants game (deciding who goes to compete in state).

...let me just say that there were way, WAY more people there than I am comfortable ever being around (not a crowd person). Fortunately I was with a lady and her family, and this lady was in on my 'quest', so she, being an incredibly good sport, walked around with me almost the whole time. And I had two people (my brother and Mike's aunt) looking for him along with me, but I never did find him. Sigh. I did spend ten bucks, got very wet and cold, and learned more about football through osmosis than I would prefer, though. So, so much for that idea...I need his number. And I'm plotting to invite him over for supper again sometime (thank you, Corvid!!).

What else...Mom and I watched some 'celebrity roasts' tonight, the ones hosted by Dean Martin. MAN, those guys were brutal to each other! And a little, *ahem* off-color at times. *twitch* And I officially ate too much Chinese takout tonight. But it's so good... *drools* Breached 30,000 words tonight and clipped Javvie's nails (a feat in itself--and for the uninformed, Javvie is the dog). I thought about going to bed early but I'm not sure if I will. Maybe I'll watch 'The Matchmaker' :D
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And as far as the last two days go...it's been raining nonstop, getting very cold, I made a book cover in photoshop for graphic design class, I breached 33,000 words in NaNo today, and I made a huge batch of cookies yesterday. They are AMAZING if I say so myself. XD And now, I'm going to continue writing on my NaNo and see if I can get some sketches in this afternoon.

Mood: Gleeful
Music: None

I survived dinner last night, with not only my confidence intact but with a very good feeling about the situation as a whole!

So tonight Mom and I made an amazing dinner:
~salad with a balsamic viniagrette dressing
~rib-eye steak with a whiskey/cream sauce (it was to DIE for)
~twice-baked potatoes
~and for dessert, cinnamon buns (they were this new recipe that we just discovered, and they are SINFUL.)

Apparently he's been surviving on PB&Js for quite a while (he's an ag teacher/farmer/workaholic and isn't home very much), so dinner was a much-needed respite from the monotony of it all. That was score #1.

Score #2 was conversation. It wasn't awkward at all (I was freaking out an hour before dinner to the point of tears worrying about how to keep conversation going) and just kept going along very naturally. I was happeh.

Score #3 was the fact that I have my confidence bolstered at this point. We can have intelligent conversation, things seem to be going well, and I am just insanely pleased with life. I'm going to probably ask him over again sometime (or ask him out? Perhaps...) Unfortunately I won't see him for another *counts on fingers* three days, because I'm going to see 'West Side Story' tomorrow evening in play form and won't be in at the gym. I'm...sad now. But also happy! I was considering asking him if he wanted to go see WSS with me and Will but I had already asked my best friend to go. So...sigh. Another time, perhaps? And I FORGOT TO ASK FOR HIS NUMBER. GAH. *headdesk* Next time I see him I'm going to definately ask for said number. And maybe see if he'd like to go out for coffee sometime. :D

Mood: Hysterical
Music: So She Dances (Josh Groban)

I really do. You know why I love my mom? Because she goes behind the scenes at the gym and asks around for me when I'm not there to get the low-down on ma crush! (Name's Mike, by the way, for the uninformed)

So today I go into the gym to work out. I didn't know if he'd be coming in, I just thought I'd run for a while on the elliptical and lift weights. My mom informs me as I come in the door that she was asking around and got some info on Mike: he's single *pumps fist*, he's got a vote of confidence from local people as far as being a good guy, and he's looking for a wife. *flail* AAAAHHHI'MGONNADIEA;LA;DOIJLKJ!!

Ahem. So anyway. I go into the gym, run on the elliptical for about 10 minutes, when you know who walks in. Mom pounces, pulls him into a conversation (which admittedly isn't hard, he does like to talk), and while I can't talk while running I occasionally throw in something. In a few minutes I'm done on the elliptical and go get some weights; he's lifting weights too so we talk a bit back and forth. (everything from farming to commentating on the political/spiritual things happening in the country)

After a while of this Mom asks if I will make supper tonight: rib-eyes with a whiskey-cream sauce *falls over from the awesomeness of it all* I say okay, Mom continues talking to me and Mike about this recipe, etc etc. Mike says something about how his supper will probably be PB&Js (which was a huge hint for me to invite him over, but I'm kind of a dunce when it comes to these things). Then, MOM TO THE RESCUE! She asks Mike if he'd like to come over for supper and...well, long story short he's coming over for supper. Outwardly at the gym I was acting cool, but when I got home I walked very calmly in the door, closed said door, and went "AAAAAAAAAUUUUUGGGHHH!!!!" From excitement, you know.

SO THIS IS GOING TO BE EXCITING WISH ME LUCK!!! I need to take a look at the recipe--I don't even know how long it takes to cook or anything and the house needs cleaned up and I need to study for a test and AAAAHHH!!! *races around like a madperson*

ETA: Happy 11/10/09, everyone!! :D

Thanks for the last few comments, people... *beams* I really do love it when you guys leave little comments--even if it's a sentence or two.

So I'm still in a 'gushing' mood...please indulge me while I release my inner fangirling thoughts.

After my initial spazz-out about this crush, I have calmed down somewhat. I still turn into a puddle of emotional goo whenever I think about him (and he smiles at me every time he comes into the gym and I about DIE of embarrassment/glee/'HE NOTICED MEE!!'-ness), and my whole family is completely aware of my hopeless crushism (which has NEVER happened before *bites nails* ), but otherwise all is well and relatively calm.

However. There is doubt right now. So I exchange pleasantries with the fellow every day, when he arrives and leaves (the last couple of times that I've seen him we've talked a bit more extensively, much to my relief). But. Mom has expressed her opinion that he thinks I'm too young for him. I'll be honest: there's a ten-year age difference. *cringes* I know, shoot me now. But anyway. I'm not getting that signal from him at all (or maybe I'm too blind at the moment to pick it up). So all's well unless I get impatient and ask him straight up, which is doubtful at the moment as I can barely keep a conversation going, much less ask him how he feels about me. I'll probably chicken out and keep the status quo as it is now. Which isn't much, but hey. And I still get to watch him work out every other evening. *swoon* :3

On a side note: the guy's name has come up twice in the same amount of days in random instances (first time from my dad, before he even knew the guy existed, and second from my brother, who had the idea to invite him over for Thanksgiving (????) because this year we're thinking of inviting over people we don't know for Thanksgiving). Coincidence? Maybe...I'm taking it as fate. And I HOPE that Mom thinks it's okay to invite him over for Thanksgiving if it's Will's idea. *crosses fingers* Actually, Mom and Will both think that he's a really nice guy. The trick would be getting Dad to approve of him (that age thing seems to dominate over everything else in Dad's case. Sigh.). *crosses toes*

*stuffs inner fangirl into box* Ahh, better. Thanks for listening to my gushing, guys and gals. It's almost theraputic to let out everything I've been thinking and feeling and getting responses to it. :)

What else has been going on...um...oh! I hit 20,000 words today! I'm going to be a writing maniac at the gym this afternoon, because if at all possible I'd like to do 3,000 words today. I was going to do that yesterday but I had a weird stomachache all day and chose to watch 'Psycho' on my iPod instead. XD That movie is weirdly addicting, for some reason. Sigh.

AND, yesterday I finished up some sketches for a children's book that a friend of mine wrote. She would like for me to illustrate it, so I whipped off some sketches and I'll email 'em to her so she can send the sketches and story out to see if we could get the thing published. *crosses fingers*

Otherwise my art has been put on a back shelf for a while, at least until NaNo is finished. It's been gorgeous out lately so when I get a couple of hours I go out and ride the horse or shovel manure for a while (great fun, I know, but once we get a good hard freeze I won't be able to shovel 'nure until a thaw because the stuff freezes to harder than a rock). So, life's been going along as normal (as normal as life during NaNo and the throes of a crush can be anyway), and I'm not sure what else to say so I shall sign off.

Music: Everything (by Michal Blube)
Mood: Normalized

*looks at previous entry and shudders* ...can we pretend that that doesn't exist?

Okay, I won't pretend it doesn't exist: this is a perfect example of emotions run amok. That is a glimpse inside my mind when I first come to the realization of a crush, and my mind is running around screaming with no regard for logic or coherent speech. Sigh.

Now, OUTWARDLY I'm all cool and going 'life is as normal as it's always been', while my mind is falling over itself. *headdesk*

Right. So, onward...

Haven't been working on pics at all, just been doing NaNo. Although I did get to ride the horse and shovel several loads of manure today. Only three million more to go!! *rubs blistering hands*

Well...I have another thousand words to write and then it's off to the gym to help Mom make a picture-collage poster thing. *slogs off through words*

Music: (I'm In Love With) A Wonderful Guy
Mood: Gleeful

Woo, I'm in a good mood! *does a few dance steps, trips, and falls over* *pops back up* Why am I in a good mood, do you ask? Well...I'm just in a fantastic mood, let's leave it there.

I have breached 13,000 words today! *spazz* And I helped move some goats, using my handy dandy horse trailer, and backed my trailer successfully not once, not twice, not thrice, but FOUR TIMES. That is amazing...*grins* And I'm feeling very spastic at the moment, but I'll go ahead and let ya'll in on a little secret.

*points to music* I'M IN LOVE WITH A WONDERFUL GUY!!! Mwahahaha!! *resumes alternately dancing, laughing, crying, falling over, and essentially making a fool of self* All right, all right, so it's still in the crush stage, and I don't think he's aware, but STILL! This is the first time I've seriously felt this way towards someone that isn't a literary character! AND HE REMINDS ME OF ANTHONY PERKINS!!! I am using too many exclamation points!!!!!!!

(A quick note: tomorrow I'm going to read this and go 'what was I thinking??' and possibly delete it. But until then, please indulge my spazziness and just being-an-18-year-old-who-is-floating-on-the-wings-of-a-crush. Thank you.)