Les Miserables
performs
Footloose (pt. 2)
Cosette: Been working so hard I have? Really?
I'm punching my card …Um…
Eight hours, for what? Gee, I dunno.
Oh, tell me what I got Go ahead and tell me—I’m listening!
Paris Woman 1 (Urleen): Been working so hard Now that I can agree with
I'm punching my card Just ‘cause you’ve never had to work, Cosette, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t know what that means.
Eight hours, for what? Don’t ask
Oh, tell me what I got Not much
Paris Woman 2 (Wendy Jo): Been working too damn hard Ooh, profanity!
I'm punching that same card It gets pretty old too
Eight hours, I'm bustin' my butt *nod nod*
Oh, tell me what I got Still not much
All: I got this feeling that time's just holding me down Cue 16-ton weight!
Cosette,. PW1, PW2: I hate this feeling time is holding me down Just don’t let it tickle me too
All: I'll hit the ceiling or else I'll tear up this town Paint the town red! Woo!
Tonight I gotta cut loose I do?
Footloose I wonder what that term even means
Kick off your Sunday shoes Woot
Please, Louise Hey, it rhymes! Woo!
Pull me offa my knees M’kay, that doesn’t really make sense
Jack, get back Ooh, another rhyme!
C'mon before we crack I’m assuming that we’re not talking about the crack that a person takes
Lose your blues What if we don’t wanna?
Everybody cut footloose You can’t make us!
Extra 1: Hey, Ren, I hear you’re leaving Chicago! Oh, we’re in Chicago now?
Extra 2: Ren’s leaving Chicago? *to Courfeyrac* You’re leaving Chicago?? Just for a little while apparently…
Courfeyrac: Yeah, I’m leaving you clowns for the wide open spaces! I am?
Extra 3: What he means is that he’s moving to some small town no one’s ever heard of. Yeah, I’ll bet
Extra 4: They don’t even have a zip code! I don’t seem to recall Paris having zip codes either…we’re behind in the times I guess
Courfeyrac: Hey, people have heard of it— Let’s see if bluffing works!
Extra 1: Oh yeah? What’s the name of it? I don’t think it will
Courfeyrac: People are flocking from all over! People like ME! *grin*
Extra 2: What’s the name of it?? Still bluff-calling, hah
Courfeyrac: …Bomont. Ooh, nice.
All: BOMONT?? Where the hell is Bomont?? We don’t know, apparently
Cosette, PW1, PW2: You're playing so cool You are?
Obeying every rule *snort* Oh really?
Dig way down in your heart That could be a little painful
You're burning, yearning for some Some what?
All: Somebody to tell you Oh, THAT some
That life ain't passing you by And here I thought all along that it was. Shucks.
Cosette, PW1, PW2: Life ain't passing me by You got that right!
All: I'm trying to tell you
It will if you don't even try I’m sure
You can fly Maybe these writers WERE on crack. I know that this fanfic writer must be to come up with such drivel.
Bramble: No editorials!!
Courfeyrac: If you'd only cut loose Yay!
All: Cut footloose What fun
*Enter Musichetta, carrying a box*
Courfeyrac: Mom, where are you going to put that? The backseat is full, and I can’t close the trunk! You know, it’s kinda weird calling my girlfriend ‘Mom’. And what’s a backseat?
Musichetta: Ren, don’t start. I don’t want to leave any more than you do. And I’m not too enthralled with being called ‘mom’ either, so hush.
Courfeyrac: Then let’s not go. Yay! Rebellion!
Musichetta: Look, I too wish your father hadn’t left. I too wish things could be the way they were. I do?
Courfeyrac: Okay, okay… My rebellion didn’t last too long…
Musichetta: And we both wish I could be one of those strong, single moms who suddenly become self-sufficient but I’m not! *tongue in cheek* Please feel free to disagree. Yup, go on ahead, and I’ll bust this frying pan over your head.
Courfeyrac: Mom, we’ve got a ten-hour drive ahead of us. I’m sure we’ll find plenty of things to disagree about. This situation calls for tact. Or something like that.
All: Aaaahh
First! Oh, now we’ve got a list going?
We've got to turn you around Like playing ‘Pin the Tail On the Donkey!’
Second! There ought to be a game like that, Les Mis style
Then put your feet on the ground How about ‘Pin the Cravat On the Revolutionary’?
Third! THAT sounds like fun
Now take a hold of your soul How does a person hold their soul?
Life keeps holding me down No, really?
Everybody cut everybody cut Repetition, yay!
Everybody cut everybody cut Moar repetition!
*The scene shifts to Bomont*
Choir: On any Sunday here we'll be Sounds like fun
Raising our voices in harmony Maybe
One day once our trials have ceased …are we going to allegories or something here?
We will be released I guess so.
Valjean: On any Sunday, Lord I pray And I get my first line
Tell me exactly the words to say Maybe this play won’t turn out so bad after all
Give me strength and maybe then No, it shows promise
I can reach my fellow men Who doesn’t want to do that?
So we all may rise again *nod nod*
Thank you, Lord, Amen. Thanks for the casting, Captress.
*to congregation* Good morning!
All: Good morning, Reverend! I think we’re supposed to be happy here…
Valjean: I took the long way to church this morning, down past the creek. I heard the birds chirping and our own choir warming up in the distance. It made me think of a line by the great poet Walt Whitman, who said "I hear America singing." And I thought, ‘isn’t that right? Aren’t we the song that we sing for the world to see who we are and what we believe?’ So I ask you this morning: what song are YOU singing? …I’ve heard better preaching. Much better.
Courfeyrac: We've only been here two days and already Two days? That’s it? Yeesh
Chicago seems a million miles away It would too
But we were barely hanging on We were?
'Specially with my father gone I see
There’s not too many places we could stay Hey, at least he didn’t have a situation like Fantine.
Fantine: *off in the wings* Gee, thanks.
Courfeyrac: But maybe Mom could find a job that's steady Jobs are overrated!
And maybe I could stand it for a year Mooching is the way to go in life!
And maybe things won't be so bad That’s right, things could always be worse!
And maybe I won't miss my dad Yup, yup
And maybe we could start a new life here How optimistic.
All: Ooh, start a new life here Hurrah, echoes!
Valjean: But then I thought, if Walt Whitman were alive today what song would he hear America singing?.............which is why, every day we must ask ourselves: am I doing the right thing? Ah, a break
Courfeyrac and Musichetta: Have I done the right thing? I don’t know, have I?
Picking up my life Possibly
Packing up the past That’s a hard thing to lift
That's always fright'ning No, really?
Have I done the right thing? You tell me
Adults: The right thing! More echoes
The right thing! And a repeat
We strive to do what's right! We do?
The right thing!
The right thing! Yeesh, enough with the repeats already
Sin is a matter of black and white! Not much of a comment there
Valjean: This morning we welcome two new souls fresh from Chicago! Ethel McCormick and her son—Ron, is it? My character sounds far too optimistic
Courfeyrac: Ren. Mumble mumble
Valjean: Speak up! Let the Lord hear your voice! But the Lord can hear any voice, even if it’s just in your mind
Courfeyrac: Ren! Ren McCormick. Rawr, I’m loud now!
Valjean: Ren. Interesting name. Is it short for something? …what COULD it be short for?
Courfeyrac: *cheeky* Nope! Cheeky is my middle name! *grin*
Kids: There's rumors going 'round about the new kid There are?
And everybody's talking til they're blue That’s an interesting state of being
Cuz you know how a stranger is -
If he's not dumb he's dangerous – That’s pretty legalistic there. Or something.
But either way, at least it's something new Yay!
Valjean: Now I invite you to join my wife Vi and our daughter Ariel in this morning's convocation. This ought to be fun—oh, that’s right, Cosette isn’t playing Ariel. Phooey.
Valjean, Fantine, Eponine: God is love
Follow him and never roam
He has made the stars above
Just to light your way back home
Valjean: Everybody! Oh, counterpoint, this could be interesting
Bramble: *furiously typing* You have NO idea…
Courfeyrac and Musichetta: We've only been here two days and already
Chicago seems a million miles away Hey, didn’t we sing this earlier?
But were were barely hanging on Hum de hum…
Especially with my/his father gone
There’s not too many places we could stay
But maybe Mom/I could find a job that’s steady
And maybe I/Ren can stand it for a year This repeating of songs could get old
And maybe things won’t be so bad
And maybe I/Ren won’t miss my/his dad
And maybe we could start a new life here
Adults: The right thing The same thing?
The right thing Yup.
We strive to do what’s right Les sigh
The right thing Oh, I guess there’s a bit of harmony there too. Yay.
The right thing
Sin is a matter of black and white
The right thing
The right thing
We do the right thing More harmony!
We strive to do the right thing
Valjean, Fantine, Eponine: God is love Hey, we just sang this too
Follow Him and never roam
He has made the stars above
Just to light your way back home
Kids: There’s rumors going ‘round about the new kid Same here! What’s up??
And everybody’s talking till they’re blue
But either way Oh, I guess it’s a LITTLE different…
It’s something new
Either way at least it’s something new
All: On any Sunday morning here we'll be I think we already said that
Raising our voices in harmony Same here
Gathering to join the feast Om nom nom
Asking nought but, Lord, at least
We pray that one day once our trials have ceased Ooh, high note of doom
We will be released And another high note of doom! Ouch!
Valjean: Go in peace!
Bramble: Oh my aching fingers…
Courfeyrac: *hopeful* Does this mean we get a break?
Bramble: Why are you guys such break-mongers?? Don’t you realize that it takes much, much longer to get through a musical with you guys taking non-stop breaks?
Javert: Of course. As long as you’re going to have us here, we might as well have some fun along the way.
Bramble: …somehow it seems wrong that ‘Javert’ and ‘fun’ are in the same sentence.
Javert: I have a sense of fun, you know.
Bramble: …I’m not EVEN going to ask.
Enjolras: It’s probably best if you don’t.
Bramble: Thank you, Captain Obvious, I came to that conclusion myself. *rolls eyes*
Enjolras: No need to be rude.
Bramble: Oy. Now! We need to come to a decision here: write the scenes—at least, an abridged version of the scenes—or just go with the songs?
All: SONGS.
Bramble: *shakes head* What am I saying?? I don’t even have time to be working on this story, much less making it more involved!
Javert: Well. I’m glad you came to that conclusion yourself, because I was all prepared to knock some sense into you. *brandishes nightstick*
Bramble: …thanks, Javvie.
Javert: I try.
Bramble: So, songs. We can do that. Marius, you’re up with Eponine.
Eponine: Yee!
Marius: *looks ill* Oh boy…
Bramble: Quick run-down on this scene: Eponine, your character is trying to break out from her father’s authority by having an abusive boyfriend. Or something.
Eponine: My character doesn’t seem to be able to think clearly…
Bramble: Yeah, that’s my opinion too. But, it’s still an important scene. So here goes, people!
Bahorel: Hey Cranston, what're you doing with the preacher's daughter? Maybe we don’t want to know
Marius: Anything that I want! Ooh, I’m mean
Bahorel: Oh yeah? What does she get out of it? Do we even care?
Marius: Everything that she needs! What is this guy, a mind reader wanna-be?
Eponine: Like you'd know! Apparently so
Marius: Well, she'd like you to think she was born yesterday Hurrah for figures of speech
With her innocent looks and her little-town ways Last I saw, Paris wasn’t exactly little
When she's smiling at me she's got angels in her eyes More figures of speech
But I've seen how she moves and the girl really cooks I see…
She taught me some tricks you can't learn in books
Bramble: *is struck with a sudden sense of irony* BWAHAHAHA!! [a/n: see ‘Javert’s Intervention’ on Youtube. Eponine has a line that pertains to the last lyric]
Marius: *looks at Bramble oddly*And I'm starting to think she's a devil in disguise I’m starting to think that SHE’S nuts
Bahorel, Laigle: The girl gets around She does?
She knows what she likes Uh huh
I've got what she needs Good to know we all understand each other
Wait til tonight All righty
Bahorel: Just wait Echo, rawr
Marius, Bahorel, Laigle: We'll both make our moves M’kay
We'll cover some ground This song is so full of innuendo it’s not even funny
The girl gets around around around around around around Repetition, yay
Good God, this girl gets around Woot
Eponine: Yeah, he likes to pretend he's a man among men Now I get to say something!
But with his hands in his pockets he can't count to ten Ouch, burn!
Don't worry, baby, your secret's safe with me …maybe.
Bahorel, Laigle: Busted!
Eponine: And he bores me to tears with his beers and his bikes Right…
But I keep him around cuz when temptation strikes Sounds like an inanimate object
I got the motor, he's got the key ...riiiiight.
Marius, Bahorel, Laigle: The girl gets around More chorus
She knows what she likes Didn’t we go over this earlier?
Bahorel, Laigle: Hah! Knows what she likes Maybe
Marius (unison): I've got what she needs I see
Wait’ll tonight
We’ll both make our moves
Yeah, we’ll cover some ground
Eponine (unison): I've got what you need That’s assuming quite a bit…although if it’s M’sieur Marius I don’t mind *grins*
Maybe tonight
We'll both make our moves
Yeah, we'll cover some ground
Marius, Eponine, Bahorel, Laigle: The girl gets around around around around around around Oy, repetition…
The girl gets around around around around around around Repeated repetition!
Good God, this girl gets around!
Bramble: Phew, done with that. Okay, so Shaw runs into Ariel and Chuck making out, breaks it up, moment of awkwardness, on to the next scene! Courfey, you’ve just met Enjolras (as Willard) and are explaining to him what Chicago used to be like.
Courfeyrac: …this seems a little odd, considering how Enjolras is the leader and all…
Bramble: *facepalm* Yeesh, guys, can’t you ever forget what you USED to be like??
Enjolras: It’s not easy.
Courfeyrac: *nod nod*
Bramble: Now I can see why you would make a good zombie, Enjolras.
Enjolras: …what?
Bramble: Nothing, nothing. Um…can we get going then?
Courfeyrac: Oh, fine.
Courfeyrac: I never walk when I can run But I can save energy that way
I don't believe I ever could That was before Ritalin made its appearance
People try to slow me down I wonder how a person does that
Sayin', "Boy you really should Should what?
Kick back and chill" Oh, I see…
But I can't stand still No, really?
I called the doctor, he said, "Son, I’m assuming that that’s a familiar title or something
I cannot offer you a pill" Aw, you’re no fun anymore.
So I never found relief But what about Ritalin??
And now I've got to move until This could be interesting
I've had my fill Yay, rhyming
I can't stand still I think I’m coming to that conclusion myself…
Back where I come from Where DO I come from, anyway?
Life's never humdrum Life’s never humdrum NOW, what are you talking about?
I wish I could take you there No, I don’t
Oh, we had the world at our feet It’s always nice to have people groveling
Life was sweet Like wine, delish!
Ain't no doubt Where did this character learn grammar?
Grab a seat It’ll cost you five sous
Check it out! *does some dance moves* Hey, I never got to do this at the café!
Enjolras: You’re going to last about five minutes around here… *Enjolraic Glare Of Doom ®*
Courfeyrac: Oh, I thought it never would end Of course
But I lost it somehow Aw, how sad
Would you look at me now? Whoa, high note
I'm tryin' hard to tone it down Not really *grin*
Gotta watch my P's and Q's Not to be confused with PQ himself
Maybe look before I leap Just maybe?
And then I think, "Hey, what's the use?" I heartily agree
Ain't done it yet Of course, that could be a little worrisome for bystanders
And I can't forget how it feels when you dance 'til you drop Lots’a fun, I’m sure
So don't even try to suggest that I stop Don’t even think about it
I never will My will is as solid as a rock…
I can't... Woo, high note
No no no no Repetition?
No no no no... More repetition…
No no no no no… Even more repetition (and high notes)
Enjolras: No, no, no, no! My first line, and it’s ‘no’. Sigh.
Javert: Not that we’d expect anything less.
Courfeyrac: Then somebody kill me ‘cause *points finger at head* Bang!
I can't stand still! Whoa, super-high note…
Are you happy now, captress? My voice is shot!
Bramble: Don’t complain. You had no qualms about doing this part earlier.
Courfeyrac: Well that was earlier, this is now.
Bramble: Hush up and do the next scene.
Enjolras: What went and put a bug up your behind?
Bramble: *rummages around for aspirin* Hmm, maybe dealing with people who have the motivation of a slug has something to do with it.
Javert: How biting, captress.
Bramble: *brightens* Really? That’s biting to you?
Javert: No, not really. But I’m sure it’s biting to someone.
Bramble: Rats.
Marius: *looking at script* So…what IS the next scene anyway?
Bramble: Oh yes. Ren is informed that dancing is against the law in Bomont, and that the reasoning behind said law is because of an accident five years previous with some kids who were killed on their way home from a dance.
Javert: I’m a police officer, and even I think that that’s a little overkill.
Bramble: Hey, it’s in the script. And this explanation precedes one of the coolest songs in the play.
Javert: And what, pray, makes it so ‘cool’?
Bramble: We get to use flashlights! *whips out flashlight*
All: …
Bramble: It’s for the creepy effect, guys. You know? Eyes? Creepy?
All: *exchange glances*
Bramble: What, you guys don’t want to use the flashlights?
Combeferre: They look pretty silly, captress.
Bramble: Not on a dark stage they don’t!
Courfeyrac: Oh, we get to have a dark stage?
Eponine: This could actually be fun.
Bramble: Javert shouldn’t have any problem with this, considering that he can see in the dark…
Javert: Oh? And where is your basis for that?
Bramble: *whips out the Brick and thumbs through it* Um…let me see…
Valjean: And she’s off!
Bramble: Ah, here we go. Volume V, Book the Third, Chapter 9: "There was still sufficient light to admit of reading. Besides this, Javert possessed in his eye the feline phosphorescence of night birds."
Javert: Don’t trust Hugo on everything.
Bramble: But it’s a cool idea if you could. *grins*
Javert: Who said I didn’t?
Bramble: *headdesk* Arrgh!
Valjean: There now, don’t harass the captress…
Courfeyrac: If we don’t harass the captress, our lot in life take a negative dive!
Bramble: Gee, thanks guys. *rubs forehead* Ow, that hurt.
Javert: I’m sure that anything with a modicum of a brain could have told you that.
Bramble: I’m going to start ignoring you.
Courfeyrac: *puppy-dog eyes* Break?
Bramble: NO! Shut up and do the next scene!
All: *cower*
<<Part 1
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I'm punching my card …Um…
Eight hours, for what? Gee, I dunno.
Oh, tell me what I got Go ahead and tell me—I’m listening!
Paris Woman 1 (Urleen): Been working so hard Now that I can agree with
I'm punching my card Just ‘cause you’ve never had to work, Cosette, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t know what that means.
Eight hours, for what? Don’t ask
Oh, tell me what I got Not much
Paris Woman 2 (Wendy Jo): Been working too damn hard Ooh, profanity!
I'm punching that same card It gets pretty old too
Eight hours, I'm bustin' my butt *nod nod*
Oh, tell me what I got Still not much
All: I got this feeling that time's just holding me down Cue 16-ton weight!
Cosette,. PW1, PW2: I hate this feeling time is holding me down Just don’t let it tickle me too
All: I'll hit the ceiling or else I'll tear up this town Paint the town red! Woo!
Tonight I gotta cut loose I do?
Footloose I wonder what that term even means
Kick off your Sunday shoes Woot
Please, Louise Hey, it rhymes! Woo!
Pull me offa my knees M’kay, that doesn’t really make sense
Jack, get back Ooh, another rhyme!
C'mon before we crack I’m assuming that we’re not talking about the crack that a person takes
Lose your blues What if we don’t wanna?
Everybody cut footloose You can’t make us!
Extra 1: Hey, Ren, I hear you’re leaving Chicago! Oh, we’re in Chicago now?
Extra 2: Ren’s leaving Chicago? *to Courfeyrac* You’re leaving Chicago?? Just for a little while apparently…
Courfeyrac: Yeah, I’m leaving you clowns for the wide open spaces! I am?
Extra 3: What he means is that he’s moving to some small town no one’s ever heard of. Yeah, I’ll bet
Extra 4: They don’t even have a zip code! I don’t seem to recall Paris having zip codes either…we’re behind in the times I guess
Courfeyrac: Hey, people have heard of it— Let’s see if bluffing works!
Extra 1: Oh yeah? What’s the name of it? I don’t think it will
Courfeyrac: People are flocking from all over! People like ME! *grin*
Extra 2: What’s the name of it?? Still bluff-calling, hah
Courfeyrac: …Bomont. Ooh, nice.
All: BOMONT?? Where the hell is Bomont?? We don’t know, apparently
Cosette, PW1, PW2: You're playing so cool You are?
Obeying every rule *snort* Oh really?
Dig way down in your heart That could be a little painful
You're burning, yearning for some Some what?
All: Somebody to tell you Oh, THAT some
That life ain't passing you by And here I thought all along that it was. Shucks.
Cosette, PW1, PW2: Life ain't passing me by You got that right!
All: I'm trying to tell you
It will if you don't even try I’m sure
You can fly Maybe these writers WERE on crack. I know that this fanfic writer must be to come up with such drivel.
Bramble: No editorials!!
Courfeyrac: If you'd only cut loose Yay!
All: Cut footloose What fun
*Enter Musichetta, carrying a box*
Courfeyrac: Mom, where are you going to put that? The backseat is full, and I can’t close the trunk! You know, it’s kinda weird calling my girlfriend ‘Mom’. And what’s a backseat?
Musichetta: Ren, don’t start. I don’t want to leave any more than you do. And I’m not too enthralled with being called ‘mom’ either, so hush.
Courfeyrac: Then let’s not go. Yay! Rebellion!
Musichetta: Look, I too wish your father hadn’t left. I too wish things could be the way they were. I do?
Courfeyrac: Okay, okay… My rebellion didn’t last too long…
Musichetta: And we both wish I could be one of those strong, single moms who suddenly become self-sufficient but I’m not! *tongue in cheek* Please feel free to disagree. Yup, go on ahead, and I’ll bust this frying pan over your head.
Courfeyrac: Mom, we’ve got a ten-hour drive ahead of us. I’m sure we’ll find plenty of things to disagree about. This situation calls for tact. Or something like that.
All: Aaaahh
First! Oh, now we’ve got a list going?
We've got to turn you around Like playing ‘Pin the Tail On the Donkey!’
Second! There ought to be a game like that, Les Mis style
Then put your feet on the ground How about ‘Pin the Cravat On the Revolutionary’?
Third! THAT sounds like fun
Now take a hold of your soul How does a person hold their soul?
Life keeps holding me down No, really?
Everybody cut everybody cut Repetition, yay!
Everybody cut everybody cut Moar repetition!
*The scene shifts to Bomont*
Choir: On any Sunday here we'll be Sounds like fun
Raising our voices in harmony Maybe
One day once our trials have ceased …are we going to allegories or something here?
We will be released I guess so.
Valjean: On any Sunday, Lord I pray And I get my first line
Tell me exactly the words to say Maybe this play won’t turn out so bad after all
Give me strength and maybe then No, it shows promise
I can reach my fellow men Who doesn’t want to do that?
So we all may rise again *nod nod*
Thank you, Lord, Amen. Thanks for the casting, Captress.
*to congregation* Good morning!
All: Good morning, Reverend! I think we’re supposed to be happy here…
Valjean: I took the long way to church this morning, down past the creek. I heard the birds chirping and our own choir warming up in the distance. It made me think of a line by the great poet Walt Whitman, who said "I hear America singing." And I thought, ‘isn’t that right? Aren’t we the song that we sing for the world to see who we are and what we believe?’ So I ask you this morning: what song are YOU singing? …I’ve heard better preaching. Much better.
Courfeyrac: We've only been here two days and already Two days? That’s it? Yeesh
Chicago seems a million miles away It would too
But we were barely hanging on We were?
'Specially with my father gone I see
There’s not too many places we could stay Hey, at least he didn’t have a situation like Fantine.
Fantine: *off in the wings* Gee, thanks.
Courfeyrac: But maybe Mom could find a job that's steady Jobs are overrated!
And maybe I could stand it for a year Mooching is the way to go in life!
And maybe things won't be so bad That’s right, things could always be worse!
And maybe I won't miss my dad Yup, yup
And maybe we could start a new life here How optimistic.
All: Ooh, start a new life here Hurrah, echoes!
Valjean: But then I thought, if Walt Whitman were alive today what song would he hear America singing?.............which is why, every day we must ask ourselves: am I doing the right thing? Ah, a break
Courfeyrac and Musichetta: Have I done the right thing? I don’t know, have I?
Picking up my life Possibly
Packing up the past That’s a hard thing to lift
That's always fright'ning No, really?
Have I done the right thing? You tell me
Adults: The right thing! More echoes
The right thing! And a repeat
We strive to do what's right! We do?
The right thing!
The right thing! Yeesh, enough with the repeats already
Sin is a matter of black and white! Not much of a comment there
Valjean: This morning we welcome two new souls fresh from Chicago! Ethel McCormick and her son—Ron, is it? My character sounds far too optimistic
Courfeyrac: Ren. Mumble mumble
Valjean: Speak up! Let the Lord hear your voice! But the Lord can hear any voice, even if it’s just in your mind
Courfeyrac: Ren! Ren McCormick. Rawr, I’m loud now!
Valjean: Ren. Interesting name. Is it short for something? …what COULD it be short for?
Courfeyrac: *cheeky* Nope! Cheeky is my middle name! *grin*
Kids: There's rumors going 'round about the new kid There are?
And everybody's talking til they're blue That’s an interesting state of being
Cuz you know how a stranger is -
If he's not dumb he's dangerous – That’s pretty legalistic there. Or something.
But either way, at least it's something new Yay!
Valjean: Now I invite you to join my wife Vi and our daughter Ariel in this morning's convocation. This ought to be fun—oh, that’s right, Cosette isn’t playing Ariel. Phooey.
Valjean, Fantine, Eponine: God is love
Follow him and never roam
He has made the stars above
Just to light your way back home
Valjean: Everybody! Oh, counterpoint, this could be interesting
Bramble: *furiously typing* You have NO idea…
Courfeyrac and Musichetta: We've only been here two days and already
Chicago seems a million miles away Hey, didn’t we sing this earlier?
But were were barely hanging on Hum de hum…
Especially with my/his father gone
There’s not too many places we could stay
But maybe Mom/I could find a job that’s steady
And maybe I/Ren can stand it for a year This repeating of songs could get old
And maybe things won’t be so bad
And maybe I/Ren won’t miss my/his dad
And maybe we could start a new life here
Adults: The right thing The same thing?
The right thing Yup.
We strive to do what’s right Les sigh
The right thing Oh, I guess there’s a bit of harmony there too. Yay.
The right thing
Sin is a matter of black and white
The right thing
The right thing
We do the right thing More harmony!
We strive to do the right thing
Valjean, Fantine, Eponine: God is love Hey, we just sang this too
Follow Him and never roam
He has made the stars above
Just to light your way back home
Kids: There’s rumors going ‘round about the new kid Same here! What’s up??
And everybody’s talking till they’re blue
But either way Oh, I guess it’s a LITTLE different…
It’s something new
Either way at least it’s something new
All: On any Sunday morning here we'll be I think we already said that
Raising our voices in harmony Same here
Gathering to join the feast Om nom nom
Asking nought but, Lord, at least
We pray that one day once our trials have ceased Ooh, high note of doom
We will be released And another high note of doom! Ouch!
Valjean: Go in peace!
Bramble: Oh my aching fingers…
Courfeyrac: *hopeful* Does this mean we get a break?
Bramble: Why are you guys such break-mongers?? Don’t you realize that it takes much, much longer to get through a musical with you guys taking non-stop breaks?
Javert: Of course. As long as you’re going to have us here, we might as well have some fun along the way.
Bramble: …somehow it seems wrong that ‘Javert’ and ‘fun’ are in the same sentence.
Javert: I have a sense of fun, you know.
Bramble: …I’m not EVEN going to ask.
Enjolras: It’s probably best if you don’t.
Bramble: Thank you, Captain Obvious, I came to that conclusion myself. *rolls eyes*
Enjolras: No need to be rude.
Bramble: Oy. Now! We need to come to a decision here: write the scenes—at least, an abridged version of the scenes—or just go with the songs?
All: SONGS.
Bramble: *shakes head* What am I saying?? I don’t even have time to be working on this story, much less making it more involved!
Javert: Well. I’m glad you came to that conclusion yourself, because I was all prepared to knock some sense into you. *brandishes nightstick*
Bramble: …thanks, Javvie.
Javert: I try.
Bramble: So, songs. We can do that. Marius, you’re up with Eponine.
Eponine: Yee!
Marius: *looks ill* Oh boy…
Bramble: Quick run-down on this scene: Eponine, your character is trying to break out from her father’s authority by having an abusive boyfriend. Or something.
Eponine: My character doesn’t seem to be able to think clearly…
Bramble: Yeah, that’s my opinion too. But, it’s still an important scene. So here goes, people!
Bahorel: Hey Cranston, what're you doing with the preacher's daughter? Maybe we don’t want to know
Marius: Anything that I want! Ooh, I’m mean
Bahorel: Oh yeah? What does she get out of it? Do we even care?
Marius: Everything that she needs! What is this guy, a mind reader wanna-be?
Eponine: Like you'd know! Apparently so
Marius: Well, she'd like you to think she was born yesterday Hurrah for figures of speech
With her innocent looks and her little-town ways Last I saw, Paris wasn’t exactly little
When she's smiling at me she's got angels in her eyes More figures of speech
But I've seen how she moves and the girl really cooks I see…
She taught me some tricks you can't learn in books
Bramble: *is struck with a sudden sense of irony* BWAHAHAHA!! [a/n: see ‘Javert’s Intervention’ on Youtube. Eponine has a line that pertains to the last lyric]
Marius: *looks at Bramble oddly*And I'm starting to think she's a devil in disguise I’m starting to think that SHE’S nuts
Bahorel, Laigle: The girl gets around She does?
She knows what she likes Uh huh
I've got what she needs Good to know we all understand each other
Wait til tonight All righty
Bahorel: Just wait Echo, rawr
Marius, Bahorel, Laigle: We'll both make our moves M’kay
We'll cover some ground This song is so full of innuendo it’s not even funny
The girl gets around around around around around around Repetition, yay
Good God, this girl gets around Woot
Eponine: Yeah, he likes to pretend he's a man among men Now I get to say something!
But with his hands in his pockets he can't count to ten Ouch, burn!
Don't worry, baby, your secret's safe with me …maybe.
Bahorel, Laigle: Busted!
Eponine: And he bores me to tears with his beers and his bikes Right…
But I keep him around cuz when temptation strikes Sounds like an inanimate object
I got the motor, he's got the key ...riiiiight.
Marius, Bahorel, Laigle: The girl gets around More chorus
She knows what she likes Didn’t we go over this earlier?
Bahorel, Laigle: Hah! Knows what she likes Maybe
Marius (unison): I've got what she needs I see
Wait’ll tonight
We’ll both make our moves
Yeah, we’ll cover some ground
Eponine (unison): I've got what you need That’s assuming quite a bit…although if it’s M’sieur Marius I don’t mind *grins*
Maybe tonight
We'll both make our moves
Yeah, we'll cover some ground
Marius, Eponine, Bahorel, Laigle: The girl gets around around around around around around Oy, repetition…
The girl gets around around around around around around Repeated repetition!
Good God, this girl gets around!
Bramble: Phew, done with that. Okay, so Shaw runs into Ariel and Chuck making out, breaks it up, moment of awkwardness, on to the next scene! Courfey, you’ve just met Enjolras (as Willard) and are explaining to him what Chicago used to be like.
Courfeyrac: …this seems a little odd, considering how Enjolras is the leader and all…
Bramble: *facepalm* Yeesh, guys, can’t you ever forget what you USED to be like??
Enjolras: It’s not easy.
Courfeyrac: *nod nod*
Bramble: Now I can see why you would make a good zombie, Enjolras.
Enjolras: …what?
Bramble: Nothing, nothing. Um…can we get going then?
Courfeyrac: Oh, fine.
Courfeyrac: I never walk when I can run But I can save energy that way
I don't believe I ever could That was before Ritalin made its appearance
People try to slow me down I wonder how a person does that
Sayin', "Boy you really should Should what?
Kick back and chill" Oh, I see…
But I can't stand still No, really?
I called the doctor, he said, "Son, I’m assuming that that’s a familiar title or something
I cannot offer you a pill" Aw, you’re no fun anymore.
So I never found relief But what about Ritalin??
And now I've got to move until This could be interesting
I've had my fill Yay, rhyming
I can't stand still I think I’m coming to that conclusion myself…
Back where I come from Where DO I come from, anyway?
Life's never humdrum Life’s never humdrum NOW, what are you talking about?
I wish I could take you there No, I don’t
Oh, we had the world at our feet It’s always nice to have people groveling
Life was sweet Like wine, delish!
Ain't no doubt Where did this character learn grammar?
Grab a seat It’ll cost you five sous
Check it out! *does some dance moves* Hey, I never got to do this at the café!
Enjolras: You’re going to last about five minutes around here… *Enjolraic Glare Of Doom ®*
Courfeyrac: Oh, I thought it never would end Of course
But I lost it somehow Aw, how sad
Would you look at me now? Whoa, high note
I'm tryin' hard to tone it down Not really *grin*
Gotta watch my P's and Q's Not to be confused with PQ himself
Maybe look before I leap Just maybe?
And then I think, "Hey, what's the use?" I heartily agree
Ain't done it yet Of course, that could be a little worrisome for bystanders
And I can't forget how it feels when you dance 'til you drop Lots’a fun, I’m sure
So don't even try to suggest that I stop Don’t even think about it
I never will My will is as solid as a rock…
I can't... Woo, high note
No no no no Repetition?
No no no no... More repetition…
No no no no no… Even more repetition (and high notes)
Enjolras: No, no, no, no! My first line, and it’s ‘no’. Sigh.
Javert: Not that we’d expect anything less.
Courfeyrac: Then somebody kill me ‘cause *points finger at head* Bang!
I can't stand still! Whoa, super-high note…
Are you happy now, captress? My voice is shot!
Bramble: Don’t complain. You had no qualms about doing this part earlier.
Courfeyrac: Well that was earlier, this is now.
Bramble: Hush up and do the next scene.
Enjolras: What went and put a bug up your behind?
Bramble: *rummages around for aspirin* Hmm, maybe dealing with people who have the motivation of a slug has something to do with it.
Javert: How biting, captress.
Bramble: *brightens* Really? That’s biting to you?
Javert: No, not really. But I’m sure it’s biting to someone.
Bramble: Rats.
Marius: *looking at script* So…what IS the next scene anyway?
Bramble: Oh yes. Ren is informed that dancing is against the law in Bomont, and that the reasoning behind said law is because of an accident five years previous with some kids who were killed on their way home from a dance.
Javert: I’m a police officer, and even I think that that’s a little overkill.
Bramble: Hey, it’s in the script. And this explanation precedes one of the coolest songs in the play.
Javert: And what, pray, makes it so ‘cool’?
Bramble: We get to use flashlights! *whips out flashlight*
All: …
Bramble: It’s for the creepy effect, guys. You know? Eyes? Creepy?
All: *exchange glances*
Bramble: What, you guys don’t want to use the flashlights?
Combeferre: They look pretty silly, captress.
Bramble: Not on a dark stage they don’t!
Courfeyrac: Oh, we get to have a dark stage?
Eponine: This could actually be fun.
Bramble: Javert shouldn’t have any problem with this, considering that he can see in the dark…
Javert: Oh? And where is your basis for that?
Bramble: *whips out the Brick and thumbs through it* Um…let me see…
Valjean: And she’s off!
Bramble: Ah, here we go. Volume V, Book the Third, Chapter 9: "There was still sufficient light to admit of reading. Besides this, Javert possessed in his eye the feline phosphorescence of night birds."
Javert: Don’t trust Hugo on everything.
Bramble: But it’s a cool idea if you could. *grins*
Javert: Who said I didn’t?
Bramble: *headdesk* Arrgh!
Valjean: There now, don’t harass the captress…
Courfeyrac: If we don’t harass the captress, our lot in life take a negative dive!
Bramble: Gee, thanks guys. *rubs forehead* Ow, that hurt.
Javert: I’m sure that anything with a modicum of a brain could have told you that.
Bramble: I’m going to start ignoring you.
Courfeyrac: *puppy-dog eyes* Break?
Bramble: NO! Shut up and do the next scene!
All: *cower*
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